Writer's Block: Too scary!!

Was there something you were afraid of as a child that just seems silly to you now?

Yes. When I was in Summer Camp (picture my ass in camp...yea) there was an archery class. I was one of the few who could strung the bow but I was so bankrupted in self-esteem and my rotten luck that I was worried even if I fried the arrow strait at the target...it would ricochet and hit someone.

So I always on purpose screwed up and made the arrows hit the ground. I never told anyone that, they just thought I was mentally retarded.

Now I wish I could go back. I have never done archery since and now that I know I can shoot strait, I want to bulls-eye that mother fucking target to death!

-- Jordan

Preping for Notacon

I am a speaker at Notacon! Big pressure!

My rival talk is going to be my good friend Tiffany Rad. I have to follow and lead up to two other big acts. I swear they want to kill me. Very excited. Going to fly out and I have my own seperate hotel and room to stay at. Plus my friend *wink, wink* 0ph3lia will be there so do not be suprised if I start walking funny after one day with her.

Wish me luck!

-- Jordan
  • Current Mood
    excited excited

April Fools!

But seriously, this is the new me:

Well this now answers rob_t_firefly's question. Also, first time I've seen myself without facial hair since the seventh grade when I first grew my entire mustache out.


-- Jordan
  • Current Mood
    cheerful cheerful

Operation Crystal's Gift -- Total Success

Collapse )

I feel like our friendship is at full swing. I'm happy and she is happy. I hope she has an amazing time in Paris!

She needs all the happiness that she can get, because while it is preventable, she just found out from her doctors today that the cells in her body are unstable and that if not corrected will lead to cervix cancer.


Let's hope the rest of my Valentines Day/Chinese New Year plans are good news both for me and the recover!

P.S. I'm sorry I don't have very good pictures of the necklace and the amazing custom wooden box it came in. When I get them, I'll post 'em!

-- Jordan
  • Current Mood
    flirty flirty

Bi-Racial Hair

I have bi-racial hair
Pantene Pro-V waves on the top
Easy to style, comb, rock-
Until-I encounter my naps,
I’m not talking about those-cute detangle with the spray naps.
I’m talking about those, slave naps, like,
No comb, brush, or man can handle the kind of naps I got- like,
No way you are touching my hair-naps like
Back 10 feet up, or we can dance naps
Those naps like-
I have bi-racial hair,
Those smooth and silk rafts hanging all through my mane,
Until you get to the back, and encounter the jungle, in which you can find Tarzan and Jane.
In the front you forget and relax in the pleasure,
Until you get to the back and remember pain
Baby hair slicked back with that good 4 dollar pomade,
That goes with roots and tangles,
Soaked with that same olive oil; mixed with that spaghetti sauce momade.
I have bi-racial hair,
Combs run freely through my fine breezy, just to the part, the most you can make,
Until it gets to the back and...
I have bi-racial hair
The only thing my mother could put it in was 2 big braids,
And sometimes that was to much,
So she left half undone.
I was in the mirror, I was in the mirror,
Convincing my self I looked just like a dark-skinned Alicia Keys
I have bi-racial hair,
Because I have bi-racial blood.
I’m not talking about that-cute they met then fell in love, blood
I’m talking about that- slaved raped six times by the master,
Birthing 6 mixed babies, later hung blood
I’m talking about that cross burning in the mud, blood
And you call me a mud blood,
Slit my rist,
My blood does not excrete in black and white.
I drean in verse and in red
Like what drained from Emmit Tills’ lips when he was killed for breaking down color lines
Bi-racial who surcomes to the abuse from her peers in her middle school,
Those whose who constantly called me an Oreo
Well she’s not white, its more like Reese’s cookie, mixed breed or a mullato
That’s what it is a reverse mulatto
My roots are deep too
My bi-racial roots are not blind
Or more than cotton soft
Cause my blood were in the sun, picking cotton too
A thousand times discrated for my race
A thousand time discrated from my history y’all never get
Let textbooks be your truth
And sprinkle the ashes of your history into streams
I dream for a time and place where
Maybe y’all all accept me
Maybe we need to wake up again and remember a morning of you
Like something new
Baby I’ll be green cause my people drove there
You people drove me there
With my tender heart
Tender head
And my bi-racial hair

-- Zora Howard

-- Jordan
  • Current Mood
    good good

Go, Fat Hamster Go! -- I Haz Made A Video Game

So...why did I fell off the face of the Earth for the past three days?

I attended the Global Gaming Jam at Bloomfield Collage were you have to make a game with a certain theme from start to finish in only three days.

The theme this year was "deception". I end up coming in late of Friday so I was shoe horned into a pretty fucking awesome team. Our programmer was a god, our lead artist was a goddess and everyone else really hauled gear.

I did most of the game design stuff (although everyone had their say about the game), I managed the team so the pipeline was smooth and we all reached our end goal. I also did all the Audio (pulling off the achievement of all sound effects done with my own body) and the Opening and Closing videos.

Here is a video of it in motion (spoilers!):


Spread the word!

-- Jordan White
  • Current Mood
    pleased pleased

The Big Googowski


APPLE hurls new product out on the market. POW! It's another GOLDMINE!

Apple: WHOOOO!

Apple walks back to his team with a SHIT EATING GRIN plastered on his face.

Apple: I'm generating high profits tonight! Mark it Goog!

APPLE sits down with GOOGLE AKA "The Goog", a hippy-looking guy looking PISSED off next to MICROSOFT, an overweight man with aviator glasses looking even MORE PISSED OFF.

Microsoft: This was a valued search engine...*CLEARS THROAT*...this was a-

Google: Yea, man, it really tied the internet monopoly together...

Microsoft: So this was a valued uh-

Google: YEA!

Apple: What tied the internet monopoly together Goog?

Google: Google China.

MICROSOFT is tapping a cigarette against his zippo lighter, staring at APPLE FURIOUSLY.

Microsoft: Were you listening to the Goog's story Apple?

Apple: What?

Google: Microsoft...

Microsoft: Where you listening to the Goog's story!?

Apple: I was shipping units.

Microsoft: So you have no frame of reference here Apple! Your like a CHILD who wanders into the middle of a movie wondering what-

Google: Microsoft. Microsoft! What's the point man?

Microsoft: There's no reason, here's my point Goog, there's no fucking reason why these fucking-

Apple: Yea Microsoft whats your point?

Microsoft: HUH?

Google: Microsoft. What is the poin-look! We all know who is at fault here! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!?!

Microsoft: Huh!? No what the fuck are you!? I'm not!?!

MICROSOFT, PUZZLED, takes a minute to rethink his words.

Microsoft: We are talking about UNCHECKED AGGRESSION here Goog-

Apple: What the fuck is he talking about here?

Google: My search engine.


Google: MICROSOFT! The Chinaman who hacked my private emails-I can't give him a fine...so what the fuck are you talking about!?!

Microsoft: What the FUCK are you talking about? The Chinaman is not the issue here Goog! I'm talking about drawing a line in the sand Goog, across this line, YOU DO NOT-

MICROSOFT changes his tone of voice.

Microsoft: Also Goog...Chinaman is not the preferred nomenclature...Asian American please.

Google: Microsoft...this isn't the a guy who built the railroads here...this is a guy-


Google: Microsoft! They SHUT DOWN my search engine!

Apple: They shut down The Goog's search engine!


Microsoft: APPLE YOU ARE OUT OF YOUR ELEMENT-Goog! The Chinaman is NOT the issue here!

GOOGLE get's up to stretch in preparation to throw his content into market.

Google: So...who? Who-

Microsoft: Li Changchun! The other guy who runs Google China. THE MINISTER OF TELECOMMUNICATIONS!

Google: *stretching* That's fucking interesting man-that's fucking interesting!

Microsoft: Plus! He has the wealth...obviously! AND the resources. Uh. So there is no reason-THERE'S NO FUCKING REASON-why his HACKERS should go out and break into private E-Mail all over your systems and then they come AND THEY SHUT DOWN YOUR FUCKING SEARCH ENGINE! AM I WRONG!?

Google: No...

Microsoft: AM I WRONG???

Google: Yea...but-

Microsoft: OK THEN! UGH!

MICROSOFT sticks a cigarette in his mouth and lights his zippo lighter.

Microsoft: That search engine really tied the internet monopoly together did it not?

Google: Fucking A!

Apple: And this guy shut it down!?

Microsoft: Apple. Please.

MICROSOFT lights his cigarette.

Google: You know this is the fucking guy-I could FIND this Changchun-Google China guy!

Apple: His name is Google? That is your name Goog!

Google: This is the guy who should compensate me for the fucking search engine!

GOOGLE takes a quick sip of his BEER.

Google: His hackers go around breaking into private E-Mails and they shut down MY search engine.

Microsoft: They shut down YOUR fucking search engine?

Google: ...they shut down my fucking search engine.

Microsoft: That's right Goog...

MICROSOFT looks at GOOGLE with FURIOUS INTENT in his eyes.



-- Jordan
  • Current Mood
    creative creative

I Told You So...

Seriously, is ANYONE surprised by this. If you are, your a giant moron and you should not be allowed to vote even for the PTA meeting.

-- Jordan
  • Current Mood
    apathetic apathetic